Sarah Baldwin

Collecting leaves for a fairy garden!

Wednesday 3rd Sep I had a lovely walk with my niece, and we collected enough leaves to create a beautiful fairy garden at home. It was fun sheltering from the rain under the magic trees too! 
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My lovely Grandma, and 72 phone calls

Tuesday 2nd Sep

I want to share a bit more about why I am doing this. We all have stories like this, and mine is nothing super special or dramatic, but just as in all families, in its own delicate, uneventful way was meaningful to me. 

My Grandma was small but mighty - imagine a female version of my Dad,  with a cheeky face, a London accent, and someone who loved to squeeze your hand extra tight and sneak you sweets. Famous for regaling how she was ‘engaged thrice, married twice’ (with a wink) and ready to demonstrate the special twirl she did whenever she threw a netball. Obsessed with our little family, ever present, but fiercely fit and independent, she was full of applause at concerts, self-declared had a ‘bit of a temper’, and would indulge us in special notes in swirling writing, "To my dearest Sarah Anne." Without thinking I would buy an extra ticket for her for every school and Uni event – she never missed a moment.

My Grandma developed dementia around 83, it was a gradual decline, followed by a plateau, bringing some false hope, then more serious decline until she died at around 96.

This isn’t all a sad story. For a long time her confusion was hidden behind jokes, fast retorts, scripted answers - and many carers could be fooled, or we would laugh along, and the world she occupied often brought her joy. But the tougher side was  increasingly surfacing -  hundreds of evening  phone calls , thousands of notes, mislaid items, mix ups and anguish we had forgotten her, minutes after we had left. Anger, late night dashes to her house, and a shrinking world – day centres brought confusion, friends were unfamiliar, and later on– mistaking me for her peroxide haired, 60 year old carer.  I felt a latent sadness that things were changing. The strain was there mainly for my parents, keeping up jobs, keeping “it all going” with the phone still ringing night after night. My parents installed a call counter - once it rang 72 times.

We choose not to remember her in this way, instead regaling the stories of her hilarity, of food fights, stubbornness and her wise advice on the “save / spend pennies” in the post. And for some of us – her ability to go ‘marching about’ when she didn’t get her own way!

What seems strange to me, all these years on, is as a healthy woman, who walked everywhere, never drove, ate well and lived a clean life, this seemed to be classed as inevitable.

Is that really right? Do we need to accept it? Maybe so. But as an aging population, I wouldn’t mind a scientific breakthrough or two…

My family are great at asking for help – so Grandma had a network around her from charities like Dementia UK and Age UK.  But even with this, every family needs more support. So I am delighted that by getting off my …. chair, in some tiny way, we can help other families who might be getting their 72^nd  phone call of the night….

With love and thoughts for anyone with a story.

Thanks again for all your support x

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Looser shoes are better than tight ones....

Tuesday 2nd Sep it turns out...

Thanks to everyone who has supported me! I am writing this early on as I am so touched by these donations and I am hoping this will all help support families who are caring for a loved one.

What I have noticed so far:
Day 1 I thought there was something wrong with my feet. It turns out if you wear sandals for three months your feet forget what it means to be tied up. After about 10 mins I thought my epic challenge was over,  limped along the road and thought - well that's it - I am so bad at this, I can't even walk down the road with this blinding pain.  Fortunately in a stroke of genius I  decided to let them (the feet) hang free(r), with a few expletives, and what do you know,  I was back rocking and rolling!  So there's a TOP tip for you. It may be that this is not beneficial in the longer term... but we shall see...

Other things I have noticed so far -
- The houses on Railton Roads have some really quirky window frames
- There are LOADS of nail bars on Acre Lane and the cheapest is nearer Lidl
- You can buy sandwich thins for 69p in Lidl - sheltering from the rain
- My skin is glowing from 2 days of walking!
-  Sometimes I feel like I am Forrest Gump and that could walk across Europe – other times… less so .

Honestly though, so chuffed to see the money rolling in. Thank you! A bit about why I am doing this in the following blog....

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